The Hidden Cost of Overworking: Breaking the Boom-and-Bust Cycle

“Nothing in life is free… except cheese in a mouse trap.”

That’s what my parents used to say. At the time, it seemed like a lesson about money — if you want something, you have to work for it. But as I’ve reflected more deeply, I’ve realized it’s also a lesson about energy.

Everything has a cost: not just in dollars, but in time, emotion, and presence. A free drink at a restaurant might cost you 45 minutes of waiting. A thoughtful gift from a friend might subtly carry the weight of obligation. Even finding a dollar on the street costs a moment of emotional attention — to notice it, wonder who lost it, and wrestle with what to do.

This idea — that everything carries a cost — shows up very clearly in the lives of high-achieving women who struggle with overworking. The push to constantly do more, be more, and stay ahead can feel motivating on the surface… but it often leads to a damaging cycle of burnout and emotional depletion.

Especially for women with ADHD, this pattern can become even more extreme.

Let’s talk about what that looks like — and how to break free from it.

What Is the Boom-and-Bust Cycle?

The boom-and-bust cycle is a common but often misunderstood pattern, especially among women with ADHD. Here’s how it tends to play out:

• You enter a phase of hyperfocus — working long hours, laser-focused on a project or task, full of energy and excitement.

• Then, often suddenly, your system crashes. You feel physically, emotionally, and mentally depleted. You can’t concentrate. You feel guilty or ashamed. You “numb out” with TV, social media, or avoidance.

• After enough recovery time, the cycle begins again.

It’s easy to confuse this cycle with procrastination or laziness, but it’s actually a neurological and emotional survival pattern. And it’s exhausting.

ADHD and the Role of Hyperfocus

If you’re someone with ADHD (formally diagnosed or self-identified), your brain works a little differently. It’s not about being unfocused — it’s about having an interest-based nervous system.

This means your attention naturally flows toward what’s novel, emotionally charged, or urgent — not necessarily what’s “important” or planned. When something does capture your attention, you can enter a state of intense concentration known as hyperfocus. It feels productive, exciting, even euphoric.

But here’s the catch: It’s not sustainable.

Hyperfocus uses up a lot of energy. You might forget to eat, hydrate, or rest. You might push past your physical and emotional limits because it feels good in the moment — and because others are praising your productivity.

Then comes the crash. You’re overwhelmed, irritable, unable to think clearly. You stop doing everything, not because you want to, but because your system is depleted. And unfortunately, this is when self-criticism often hits the hardest.

High-Achieving Women and Invisible Costs

Even if you don’t identify as someone with ADHD, you may still recognize this pattern. For many high-achieving women — especially those who’ve been praised for their productivity since childhood — this cycle is fueled by internalized pressure to always be doing more.

You might find yourself:

• Competing with your past self

• Saying yes to everything, even when you’re exhausted

• Feeling guilty for resting

• Measuring your worth by how much you accomplish

This isn’t just a mindset issue. It’s a nervous system issue. And left unchecked, it leads to chronic stress, burnout, and emotional disconnection.

Recognizing the Hidden Costs of Overworking

So what’s the cost of these “boom” cycles?

• Energetic cost: You run on adrenaline and dopamine, then crash into depletion.

• Emotional cost: You feel shame, self-doubt, and fear of inconsistency.

• Relational cost: You overextend yourself and become resentful, withdrawn, or irritable with others.

• Creative cost: You lose clarity and momentum when burnout blocks your natural flow.

At first, these costs are invisible. But over time, they build up — and they will take a toll on your mental health, your self-trust, and your joy.

Breaking the Boom-and-Bust Pattern

You don’t need to be afraid of your drive. Your passion, focus, and vision are gifts. But to use them sustainably, you need structure, self-awareness, and permission to rest.

Here’s where to start:

1. Check in with your body

Set a timer to pause every 45–90 minutes. Ask yourself:

• Am I hungry, thirsty, or tired?

• Do I need a stretch, a walk, or a break?

• Am I pushing through or listening inward?

2. Set a stop time — and stick to it

The best time to stop working is before you feel depleted. Choose a time in advance, and honor it like a boundary. You’ll feel better the next day.

3. Work in aligned sprints

Do you prefer long stretches with long breaks? Or shorter bursts of focused work with quick rests in between? Experiment with what pacing feels sustainable.

4. Plan for recovery, not just effort

If you know a “boom” cycle is coming (big launch, deadline, event), plan the recovery period before it starts. Schedule rest, movement, and emotional support.

5. Use compassion, not criticism, when you crash

If you find yourself in a “bust” period, remind yourself: This is part of the cycle. I’m not broken. I’m recovering.
The more kindness you show yourself now, the faster you’ll reset.

Try This: Self-Reflection Prompts for Sustainable Pacing

• How long do I want this work period to last?

• What helps me transition out of work and into rest?

• Can I check in with myself every hour today?

• What does sustainable success look and feel like for me?
  

Final Thoughts: Rest Is Productive

You are not lazy for needing rest. You are not unreliable for needing recovery time. You are a human with a beautifully complex nervous system — and you are allowed to honor that.

Whether you identify as neurodivergent or not, if you find yourself stuck in boom-and-bust cycles, consider this your invitation to pause. To plan. To rest before it’s urgent.

You don’t need to earn your worth through exhaustion. Your presence, peace, and joy matter more than your productivity.

And yes, everything has a cost — but you get to decide which costs are worth your resources.

✨ Want Support Shifting This Pattern?

If you’re tired of cycling between overworking and burnout, I created two powerful options to help you shift:

• Magnetic Reality is a transformational program that blends self-guided content with in-depth coaching support. It’s designed to help you break out of survival mode and create a sustainable, soul-aligned life — with tools, practices, and guidance tailored to your nervous system.

• Mindful Mavens is my high-touch group coaching experience for heart-led women ready to step into emotional leadership, creative alignment, and embodied ease — with real-time support and a powerful community of like-minded women.

Whichever path you choose, you don’t have to do it alone ❤️